Damning With Faint Praise; or, Whither Steely McBeam?

Monday, September 17th, 2007, 11:55 am

In his Monday Morning QB column Peter King ranks the Steelers as the 5th-best team in the NFL, behind one-time losers San Diego and Chicago. This is bad enough, but here’s what King has to say about our gold-helmeted (for this week, anyway) warriors:

Steelers 60, Foes 10. Though Foes are Cleveland and Buffalo, don’t concentrate on that. Concentrate on the fact the Steelers are playing terrific, bone-crunching, Bear-like football.

Bear-like football? Yo Pete, I know you have trouble remembering events that don’t feature the Patriots, Jets or Giants, but the Steelers won a Super Bowl a couple of years ago. Have won 5, in fact. You don’t compare the Steelers to some other team. Especially one whose offense features the comic stylings of Rex Grossman at quarterback. Suffocating defense and a strong running game? That’s Steeler football, thank you very much.

And the last time the Steelers played the Bears? The Black-and-Gold beat them Bears 21-9, kicking off the winning streak that didn’t end until they won Super Bowl XL. And the signature play of that game was Jerome Bettis running over All-Universe linebacker Brian Urlacher with the ease of a Bus pancaking a traffic cone.

"Bear-like football". Yeah, right.

In related news, the dread figure of Steely McBeam did not pollute my TV screen for a second yesterday. Was he at the game? Did he make an appearance and vanish, or have the Steelers done the good and wise thing and quietly sent his foam-rubber ass out to pasture?. Or, and it pains me to even think this, was he running about free and terrorizing the children during the game? Where do we stand?

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