Plot, Schmlot

Friday, April 13th, 2007, 9:23 pm

Last week I saw an incomprehensible movie with no easily discernible plot. The movie was Inland Empire and was directed by David Lynch.

This afternoon I saw an incomprehensible movie with no easily discernible plot. The movie was Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie For Theaters and was not directed by David Lynch. That’s Hollywood for you–cranking out the same cookie-cutter movies over and over and over again.

The opening sequence of ATHFCMFT was vomit-threateninly funny. It was a parody of those little ads you see before the movie starts where anthropomorphic bags of popcorn and candy dance around and entice you to visit the concession stand. And then a bunch of hardcore and very metal pretzels, gumdrops and nachos throw down and blast out a kickass song called “Cut You Up With a Linoleum Knife”. Which song contains some of the greatest lyrics in music history:

If I see you videotaping this movie
Satan will rain down your throat with hot acid
And saw your testicles
And turn your guts into snakes

This is a copyrighted movie for Time-Warner
If I found you sold it on eBay
I will break into your house and tear your wife in half

If I have one criticism of the film is that it needed more Carl. More Carl is always a frickin’ good thing.

Now I’m jumping back on the Lynchian bandwagon and I’m working my way through Season 2 of Twin Peaks. More on this later, perhaps.

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2 Responses to “Plot, Schmlot”

  1. Tom T Says:

    Boy, I hate to be the bearer of ill tidings, but TPS2 sucked. One of the biggest disappointments of my life after the incredibly cool first season. Rent all seven seasons of Buffy the Vampire Slayer instead.

  2. The Oven Mitt Says:

    You the Man

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