Jesus Tapdancing Christ

Saturday, February 19th, 2005, 10:30 pm

Still recovering from my illness I played 2 SNGs today (poker is an AMA-approved therapy, by the way). I felt a lot sicker when I got knocked out in 7th and 8th place. In those 2 tournaments I won one hand. One. Uno. And that was a $45 pot when I just bet and had everyone fold. What made it worse was that at least half the people at my table were thunderifically horrible players. My bankroll has yet again slipped into the danger zone, so I must start producing results or…something.

On the good side I’ll have another article published soon, and I spent the rest of the day researching and writing another, which rather overshadows my lousy run of form. Maybe my poker play is -EV, but at least my writing is more making up for it. Maybe I should just chalk up my continuing losses as research and write it off on my taxes.

Jackpot Jay, I feel your pain. I like Jay Lovinger’s columns, I think some folks are too hard on him. Though, to be honest, he has given reason for folks to tee off from time to time. He wrote in one column that he thought the writing on Tilt was excellent, when in fact its execrable, and he does go on way, way too much about his bad beats. Of course, that’s about all he has to write about lately, and as I’ve pretty much stunk out the joint since I started playing again I can at least empathize. Lovinger really should’ve started a blog to accompany his columns. And it’s not too late to start. Getting your frustrations off your chest, getting instant feedback from your readers, that’s an advantage the blog has over the Big Media column. Comments > form letter emails.

Otis has finished blogging the EPT tournament in France. I anxiously await the story of how he played against Isabelle Mercier. Actually, I anxiously await any stories about Isabelle Mercier. But that’s just me. Have I mentioned that I hate Otis? I hope he ate a bad snail while he was over there.

Pretty good triple feature on Turner Classic Movies this evening. The Great Escape, Bullit, and The Day of the Jackal. Which is coming on now, and is an all-time favorite movie/book. Actually, I’d never seen all of Bullit before (just the car chase) and I don’t quite get the ending. Plus Jacqueline Bisset got third billing and I think she was in about 17 unnecessary seconds, pleasing to the eye tho she may have been. If you like car chases, check out the movie Ronin, with De Niro and Jean Reno. Good movie.

So I thinkI’ll spend the evening writing a bit, maybe playing some poker, and watching a great flick. Yes, I know, I party like a rock star, but let’s not forget that I’ve been sick. Maybe next week I’ll debauch.

UPDATE: Played another SNG, 30 hands, won one with AK when it got folded around to me and the BB wouldn’t play. Got AK next hand, raised the pot and got put all-in by 2 players. Flop is crap, one guy pushes all in and gets the other to fold. and the moron turns over an underpair to the flop. He went all-in with pocket 7s. After a raise and a re-raise. And he gets paid off and I continue my free fall. I’m again in that situation where I don’t know what to do, playing tight doesn’t work, playing loose doesn’t work, I can’t get a hand and when I do I run into a lunatic playing 9-4, flops bottom pair, and hits trips on the river.

OK, end rant. I just actually WON a hand. With aces, yet. First time I’ve been above par in an SNG in a week. Christ, I suck. I may need another poker break to clear my head, I’m totally snakebit.

UPDATE UPDATE: Just busted on the bubble in yet another SNG. The shortstack made a minimum raise, I put him all-in with 99, he calls with A-2 and flops and ace. Next hand I have A-2, I fold it, would’ve flopped a goddam full house and tripled up. Next hand I try pushing with KJ suited, get called by A-4 (at least not A-2), flop a Jack, and he hits his ace on the turn. Another table filled with horrible players and yet again I’m among the most horrible.

My goal for tonight is to lose every dollar I have in my account so I don’t have to play this goddam game anymore. I’m just disgusted. I can’t do anything right, I suck, and yet I know enough to know that I’m playing against players who don’t have a fucking clue and yet I lose time after time after time. It might take me all night to blow $100 five bucks at a time, but I do have all night.

UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE: Bubbled again, this time when I was forced to go all-in with AK (lost 1/2 my stack when I ran up against quads) and some guy calls my $350 bet with Q-10. Queen freaking ten. It was about a third of his stack, and he calls with Q-10. Nothing on the flop but a jack, I hit my king on the turn, a nine on the river and he gets his straight and I’m out.

After blowing 1/2 my bankroll $5 at a time this week (which has been SO much fun) I decided to cash out of Empire instead of just losing it all. Whether I ship it over to Stars or just cash out and take up falconry will have to wait until morning. I’m totally disgusted.

UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE: As I’m thinking about quitting poker and shuttering this blog and taking up clog dancing, I thought I’d check out my Site Meter records and see how many people I would be disappointing if, instead of writing, I just curled up in the fetal position wanting to die. I checked my referral page and found something odd. Normally I have a fair number of referrals from other poker blogs, hits from Google and Yahoo, and of course a large number of “unknowns”. But today, or to be more accurate tonight, I’ve had like 40 hits from other blogs, and not poker blogs. Now, if you look in the upper right hand you see a button for “next blog” and you can hit that and be taken to a random Blogger site. For some reason, I had about 40 hits from that today. Usually I get one or two a day like that, and when I see a hit from I know our blogs don’t share many readers. But today I got tons of weird hits. Blogger pushing traffic my way so everyone can witness my meltdown?

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